Twilight =/= <3

Contrary to what people might believe, I don’t hate Twilight. I simply feel sorry for the author and dislike the majority of its fans. I also feel a great disappointment in her agent and/or editor, for letting the first book be published. It was her first time ever writing, and should have stayed with her as a learning experience. Obviously she should have then wrote something else, something better, rambled less, and gotten /that/ published (to look back at Twilight like I look back at Dragon with a Thousand Faces.)

Seriously, she should be embarrassed by the work, shrug, and say, “Oh well, it was my first try.” It’s a self-insert, with a Mary Sue narrator, a boring and unlikable love interest, little to no story, and it rambles. She rambles. Adding vampires that DON’T DRINK HUMAN BLOOD, not even by donors or anything…there’s a lot of “You fail biology/physics/science forever.”

How is she supposed to learn now?

Her other book, Host, wasn’t bad. Maybe I felt a little nostalgic for Animorphs, and had always felt sorry for the yeerks, which may have led me to like that book. But it still rambles for at least 300 pages.

For those of you saying, “But she saw it in a dream!”

Well.

Let’s summarize that dream into a neat little prompt, shall we?

“A teenage boy and a teenage girl are in a sunny meadow. He is sparkling like a diamond. Explain.”

She could have written a better story from that. Hell, I could write a better story from that. I might.

Muahahahah..

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